If the Red Sox have any more injuries, it might be time to thaw out Ted's head

I mean we have access to Ted's head, don't we?

He's a lifelong Red Sox and the Sox drafted his wacko son.

Seriously, Bill Hall can't play EVERY position. We could have a cloned Splendid Splinter out in right field.

(Keep in mind everything I know about cloning I learned from the Michael Keaton film Multiplicity.)